"So, doctor, do I have cancer or not?" "Oh Jesus Christ, holy
shit, tons of it," said the doctor to Martin Shkreli.
Doctor: 'Your recovery was a miracle!' Patient: 'PRAISE GOD.
Now I don't have to pay you!'
I accidentally drank a bottle of ink.
The doctor says I'll be fine, but I feel as though I've dyed inside.
Did you hear about the cannibal who visited the ICU ward?
His doctor told him to eat more vegetables.
My doctor suggested I use ice to reduce the pain.
But I think this whiskey tastes just fine without it.