What do you call a programmer's testicles?
A hackysack.
Why are programmers bad at doing laundry?
They throw all their dirty clothes on the heap.
Apple just released a brand new programming language, *Swift*.
Job recruiters everywhere immediately started posting ads for Swift programmers with 5 years of experience.
Why can't Java programmers see well?
Because of the eclipse
What did the programmer call his ship?
Sea++