What do you get when you cross Christmas and a Duck?
A Christmas-Quacker!
Changed Grandma's email signature to
"Merry Christmas, ya filthy animal!"
What does the nationalist sing at Christmas?
Jingo Bells.
On Christmas morning I want to eat Eggs Benedict out of a hubcap.
Because there's no plate like chrome for the hollandaise.
Why did it rain on Christmas Eve?
Because of Santa and his Raindeer.