Salamanders are the most passive aggressive animal.
You grab their tail and they're like "have that one, I don't even want it"
Why don't oysters share their pearls?
Because they're shellfish.
Why is NASA having a lawsuit filed against them from animal protection?
...because curiosty killed the cat
What is your mom's favorite animal?
Macaque.
Most animals don't like gore.
But leeches are suckers for blood.