What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday?
"Aye matey!"
I think airlines should let you exit the plane
on the inflatable slide on your birthday.
What's the difference between a dim monster and a birthday candle?
The candle is a thousand times brighter!
I got my drug dealer arrested the other day Maybe
next time you'll wish me happy birthday, mom
I get the same thing for my birthday every year - a pair of socks and a piece of tail...
And they're both two sizes too big.