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I tried finding work as a Saudi executioner...
...but I couldn't get ahead.
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God: why don't we text anymore?
Me: you know why God: I can't just give everyone a Sega whenever they ask. That's not how it works Me: k
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Peter: My brother wants to work badly!
Anita: As I remember he usually does !
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What's the difference between a camera and a foot?
A camera has photos and a foot has five toes. (Told to me by a 9 year old child I work with)
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[at work] Carl, did you get naked when you used the bathroom?
*standing there with his shirt & pants on backwards* "No...why do you ask?"
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Why do we hit things when they don't work?
Because it worked with slavery
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