Wanna know what it's like being married?
Chain yourself to a wild animal. Now kick the animal.
What is the dumbest animal?
An ignoraMOOSE
What do you call a sheep with no legs?
A cloud.
What do you get when you have Tiger Woods, Stephen Hawking, and Dwayne Johnson in the same room?
An Animal, a Vegetable, and a Mineral.
Why did the chicken join a band?
Because it had the drumsticks.