Heard on Haight St.
the other day: Why didnt the lifeguard save the drowning hippie? Cause he was just too far out, man. Edit: I work on Haight St. This was in exchange for one cigarette.
A man asks his wife "Why don't you ever tell me when you have an orgasm?"
The wife says "I don't like calling you when you're at work!"
Text from niece: I'm board!
M: Perhaps you could work on your spelling. N: Wat?
Math jokes never work on me I have trouble differentiating them.
They aren't an integral part of my life and most of the time they just don't add up.
I want a woman who can cook, clean, do the laundry, pay the bills & still
set aside the time to have sex with me while her husbands at work