[ Anything I buy from now until Christmas, I consider it a gift...
] Kids! Close your eyes and hold out your hands! "Toilet paper?!"
My husband got some virtual reality goggles for christmas and so
far I like them because they make him very vulnerable to attack.
The only reason kids like Christmas is because
they're not the ones buying all the presents.
Mall Santa: what do you want for Christmas?
Me: drugs. Mall Santa *whispers* meet me in the food court in 20 minutes.
What did the the black boy get for Christmas?
Your Bike...