Today I learned two things: 1.
Build-A-Bear Workshop only lets you stuff fake animals 2. Mall security guards get to use real handcuffs
Two generations that were unable to go to bed without their stuffed
animals or blankies now feel the same way about their phones.
What animal is endangered by tooth decay?
Molar bears!
A man walks into a zoo The only animal in the entire zoo is a dog.
It's a shitzhu.
"What would be your main strength?" Well, I can communicate with animals...
"Wow, impressive. Any weaknesses?" They can't understand me.