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Burglar Jokes

92 jokes · Page 1 of 5

Jokes / Burglar Jokes

What Are Burglar Jokes?

Burglar Jokes are a fun way to bring laughter to any moment. Whether you need something to share with friends, break the ice at a gathering, or simply enjoy a good laugh, our collection of burglar jokes is here for you. Browse through the jokes below and find the ones that make you smile.

Every joke on this page is free to read and easy to share. Click the copy button on any joke to copy it instantly to your clipboard. Paste it into a message, post, or conversation and spread the laughter.

#1
5-year-old: Why is there a baseball bat under your bed?
Me: In case there's a burglar. 5: Me: 5: Why do burglars like to play baseball?
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#2
Lucy plans elaborate jewel heist.
Lucy dons cat burglar suit to conceal identity. Lucy pulls off heist. Lucy in disguise with diamonds.
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#3
*Burglar breaks into my room* *he looks around* *he softly wakes me up* Dude do you need some money or something?
I'd be happy to help
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#4
Have you heard about the sensitive burglar?
He takes things personally.
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#5
Russian burglar What does a Russian burglar wear?
( In a Russian accent ) robber boots
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#6
*grabs knife, cuts forehead, lies on floor* Wife walks in: "WHAT HAPPENED?"
"A burglar came in right when I was about to clean the house"
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#7
What's the difference between a burger and a burglar?
Cooking times.
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#8
Why didn't Kevin from Home Alone call the cops when the burglars came around?
He was running a trap house.
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#9
[break-in] BURGLAR: [cracks safe] COP: Not so fast,
kiddo BURGLAR: [cracks safe more slowly]
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#10
Which burgers are dishonest?
Cat-burgers! (burglars)
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#11
*dog barks at absolutely everything, every time* Me: SHUT UP *dog barks
at burglar, one time* Me: It's like he just knew there was danger
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#12
*sees burglar *throws flashlight at him *misses *throws another *misses
*throws another *misses *throws another Burglar: WTF Me: COSTCO
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#13
If burglars broke into my apt, they'd look around, shake their heads and
leave me some cash with a note that says 'get yourself some shit!'
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#14
[burglar gently waking me]
you live like this?
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#15
If you believe the home alarm commercials, the first thing burglars
do when they break into your home is smash your family pictures.
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#16
When God made raccoons he was like do you want to be an old timey burglar or a trash digger.
Too slow. You're both now.
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#17
Me: Who could that be?
It's 2:00 in the morning. Her: I don't know. Do burglars knock? Me: It depends on how they were raised...
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#18
wife: "remember when i said you were too friendly all the time?"
me: [making cup of tea] "no im not" burglar: "two sugars please"
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#19
I got robbed last night The burglar replaced
everything with an exact replica
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#20
How did the burglar get into the house?
Intruder window
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❓ Frequently Asked Questions

What are the best Burglar Jokes?
Our collection features 92 Burglar Jokes. Browse the list above and find the ones that make you laugh the most.
Are Burglar Jokes suitable for everyone?
Most Burglar Jokes on our site are appropriate for general audiences. We clearly label any content meant for adults, so you can browse safely.
Can I copy and share Burglar Jokes?
Yes! Every joke has a Copy button. Click it once and the full joke is copied to your clipboard. You can then paste it anywhere you like.
How many Burglar Jokes are available?
We currently have 92 Burglar Jokes in our collection. We add new ones regularly, so check back often.
Why do people enjoy Burglar Jokes?
Burglar Jokes are loved because they are easy to remember, fun to share, and work well in almost any social setting.

Why People Enjoy Burglar Jokes

Everyone enjoys a good laugh, and burglar jokes deliver exactly that. They are easy to remember, fun to share, and work in almost any setting. Whether you are at a party, at work, or chatting online, a well-timed joke from this category always gets a great reaction.

Another reason people love burglar jokes is their simplicity. You do not need a long setup or a complicated punchline. A short, clever joke is often all it takes to turn an ordinary moment into a memorable one. That is why these jokes remain a favorite for so many people.

💬 People Also Ask

What is a good Burglar Jokes to share?
A good burglar jokes depends on your audience and the moment. Browse our collection above and pick one that fits your style and situation.
Are Burglar Jokes safe for all ages?
Most burglar jokes in our collection are suitable for general audiences. We clearly label any content meant for adults, so you can browse with confidence.
When is the best time to tell Burglar Jokes?
burglar jokes work well in almost any social setting. Use them to break the ice at a party, lighten the mood at work, or add fun to a casual conversation.
How do I copy and share Burglar Jokes?
Every joke on this page has a Copy button. Click it once and the full joke is copied to your clipboard. You can then paste it into messages, emails, or social media posts instantly.
Are new Burglar Jokes added regularly?
Yes, we refresh our collection with new burglar jokes on a regular basis. Bookmark this page and come back often to discover fresh laughs.
Can I find Burglar Jokes for a specific occasion?
Absolutely. Our collection covers many themes and occasions. Browse the related topics section on this page to find jokes tailored to birthdays, holidays, work events, and more.

Tips for Sharing Burglar Jokes

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