What Are Guarantee Jokes?
Guarantee Jokes are a fun way to bring laughter to any moment. Whether you need something to share with friends, break the ice at a gathering, or simply enjoy a good laugh, our collection of guarantee jokes is here for you. Browse through the jokes below and find the ones that make you smile.
Every joke on this page is free to read and easy to share. Click the copy button on any joke to copy it instantly to your clipboard. Paste it into a message, post, or conversation and spread the laughter.
#1
I guarantee you Adam & Eve were white.
You ever try and take a rib from a black man?
#2
Which space on a Battleship grid guarantees victory?
I1
#3
Looking back 2016 was a very eventful year.
But I guarantee 2017 will trump it.
#4
That's so nice of Activia to offer a money back guarantee.
Am I supposed to send them pictures of myself not shitting?
#5
My New Year's Resolution is to start smoking I already smoke and am
trying to stop; this way I guarantee I'll have quit by mid-February
#6
It doesn't matter if it's fight club or book club or some other
kind of club, I guarantee I don't want to talk about it.
#7
The best way to refuse a credit card telemarketer is to tell them you're unemployed.
Guarantees them hanging up within seconds.
#8
Condoms don't guarantee safe sex anymore...
A friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot by the woman's husband.
#9
If pizza places cold called people's homes and asked if they wanted
to order a pizza, I guarantee you their business would triple.
#10
Condom Warning Condoms no longer guarantee safe sex.
A friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot dead by the woman's husband.
#11
How do you guarantee that your wishes always come true?
Wish for something that is already true.
#12
I find it Hillaryous that the presidential candidates this year are so horrible.
I wonder if either of them will pull out their Trump card to guarantee that win though.
#13
If Scientists invent a pill to make us immortal,
I guarantee I'd choke to death swallowing it.
#14
I don't know how many girls it takes to change a lightbulb but I fucking
guarantee you they'd post pictures of them doing it on Facebook.
#15
Guarantees in life 1.
Death 2. A waitress will ask how everything is while your mouth is full but never be around when you need a refill
#16
My toothpaste says it guarantees whiteness within two weeks..
Yet after two weeks I'm still asian
#17
This baby at McDonalds may have started the screaming
competition, but I guarantee I'm going to win it.
#18
I guarantee you, this is
a joke Donald Trump
#19
I don't know why they don't let priests marry and have kids
seems like a great way to guarantee they don't have sex.
#20
Clicking the 'Remember Me' button on login pages guarantees
all your favorite websites will show up to your funeral.
Why People Enjoy Guarantee Jokes
Everyone enjoys a good laugh, and guarantee jokes deliver exactly that. They are easy to remember, fun to share, and work in almost any setting. Whether you are at a party, at work, or chatting online, a well-timed joke from this category always gets a great reaction.
Another reason people love guarantee jokes is their simplicity. You do not need a long setup or a complicated punchline. A short, clever joke is often all it takes to turn an ordinary moment into a memorable one. That is why these jokes remain a favorite for so many people.
Discover More Guarantee Jokes
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