What Are Defence Jokes?
Defence Jokes are a fun way to bring laughter to any moment. Whether you need something to share with friends, break the ice at a gathering, or simply enjoy a good laugh, our collection of defence jokes is here for you. Browse through the jokes below and find the ones that make you smile.
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#1
I often cry after sex.
But in my defence, I use a pretty big onion.
#2
What do you get if you drop a piano on a team's defence?
A flat back four!
#3
My wife says she's leaving me because of my obsession with Football Manager.
In my defence, I've got Dani Alves, Kompany, Vidic and Lahm.
#4
a Guy walks down an American street.
He sees a policeman and wave. Later the same day the police explain to the press: ''It was self-defence, he had a gun in his hand somewhere''
#5
Two duck hunters You know about the two duck hunters who were found dead in Texas?
The lawyer for the defence says the accused acted in self defence and that the community says duck lives matter too.
#6
Umm, your honour?
In my defence, I think it was a pretty decent exposure.
#7
Researchers say men are 3 times more likely to be the first to say "I love you", than women.
In our defence, ladies, we don't mean it
#8
Trump chose his Secretary of Defence But
who will be Secretary of De Wall?
#9
My girlfriend says she's leaving me because I'm obsess with football
In my defence I got Kolarov,Otamendi,Thiago Silva and Dani Alves
#10
"Don't knock it till you tried it!"
Doesn't help your defence in court.
#11
In the 1945-6 Nuremberg Trials what should have been the opening statement from the defence counsel representing the Nazi War criminals?
'If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all.'
#12
I got caught making out with my cousin once - mum and dad went mental.
In my defence we were just kids, and there was an awful lot of alcohol at her funeral.
#13
Why do programmers hate designing flood defence simulations?
Because of the overflow errors!
#14
Today I masturbated 8 times!
A personal record for me... In my defence Schindler's list was a long film
#15
Teacher : Give me a sentence with the words defence defeat and detail in it.
Pupil : When a horse jumps over defence defeat go before detail !
#16
Why do managers bring suitcases along to away games ?
So that they can pack the defence !
#17
What do you call the removal of a fence?
Defence
#18
I killed a girl who posted too many selfies.I
think i can claim selfie-defence.
#19
What's the difference between Brazil and Oscar Pistorious?
Oscar Pistorious has a better defence and more shots on Target
#20
lawyer: "my client claims the altercation began because - and
i quote - "he came at me sideways" crab: "in my defence.."
Why People Enjoy Defence Jokes
Everyone enjoys a good laugh, and defence jokes deliver exactly that. They are easy to remember, fun to share, and work in almost any setting. Whether you are at a party, at work, or chatting online, a well-timed joke from this category always gets a great reaction.
Another reason people love defence jokes is their simplicity. You do not need a long setup or a complicated punchline. A short, clever joke is often all it takes to turn an ordinary moment into a memorable one. That is why these jokes remain a favorite for so many people.
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