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Guard Jokes

199 jokes · Page 1 of 10

Jokes / Guard Jokes

What Are Guard Jokes?

Guard Jokes are a fun way to bring laughter to any moment. Whether you need something to share with friends, break the ice at a gathering, or simply enjoy a good laugh, our collection of guard jokes is here for you. Browse through the jokes below and find the ones that make you smile.

Every joke on this page is free to read and easy to share. Click the copy button on any joke to copy it instantly to your clipboard. Paste it into a message, post, or conversation and spread the laughter.

#1
[death row] GUARD: Ok, here's your last meal.
Bon appetit. CAT: *slowly pushes meal off table*
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#2
Mike Pence has a strong resume, including Governor of Indiana and Shawshank Prison Guard.
#VPDebate
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#3
"Does my uniform make me look
fat?" -Insecurity guard
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#4
The Holacust isn't funny my grandfather died in
one of those camps he fell off his guard tower
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#5
"MEN, WE ARE AT WAR WITH THE GREEKS & MUST NOT DROP OUR GUARD AT ALL"
"Sir, the enemy gave us a giant wooden horse" "Oh rad bring it in"
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#6
A White Guy.
If a white guy is surrounded by 3 black guys, he's getting robbed. 30 black guys, he's a football coach. 300 black guys he's a prison guard.
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#7
Did you hear about the prison breakout yesterday?
Those prison guards should have used ProActiv.
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#8
The people of Baltimore played GTA yesterday...
Tonight they will see the National Guard play Call of Duty.
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#9
Why couldn't the life guard save the hippie?
He was too far out, man.
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#10
Only one more sleep to go before I lose
my job as a night security guard.
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#11
SECURITY GUARD: [speaking into the cuff of his shirt] The president is
on his way to the car LITTLE MOUSE THAT LIVES IN HIS SLEEVE: Ok cool
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#12
What do you call a security guard in a jumping castle?
A Bouncer
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#13
From my 7 year-old son: What rhymes with 'boo' and really stinks?
You. Why I oughta...! Edit: Wow, thanks for all the love. My son is quite the character and he really caught me off guard with this!
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#14
German tourist crosses Polish border.
Border guards ask him: -Name? -Hans -Surname? -Schmidt -Occupation? -No, just traveling.
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#15
Please don't joke about WWII, my grandpa died in
a KZ camp He fell down from the guard tower.
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#16
How many Frenchmen does it take to guard Paris?
No one knows, it's never been done before
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#17
75 years ago my grandfather died in a concentration
camp he fell off a guard tower
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#18
My great great grandfather died in a Nazi death camp.
He fell off of a guard tower.
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#19
Prison guard is a pretty good job.
Who's going to steal a prison.
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#20
Cops in movies keeping guard outside hospital
rooms have a 0% success rate.
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❓ Frequently Asked Questions

What are the best Guard Jokes?
Our collection features 199 Guard Jokes. Browse the list above and find the ones that make you laugh the most.
Are Guard Jokes suitable for everyone?
Most Guard Jokes on our site are appropriate for general audiences. We clearly label any content meant for adults, so you can browse safely.
Can I copy and share Guard Jokes?
Yes! Every joke has a Copy button. Click it once and the full joke is copied to your clipboard. You can then paste it anywhere you like.
How many Guard Jokes are available?
We currently have 199 Guard Jokes in our collection. We add new ones regularly, so check back often.
Why do people enjoy Guard Jokes?
Guard Jokes are loved because they are easy to remember, fun to share, and work well in almost any social setting.

Why People Enjoy Guard Jokes

Everyone enjoys a good laugh, and guard jokes deliver exactly that. They are easy to remember, fun to share, and work in almost any setting. Whether you are at a party, at work, or chatting online, a well-timed joke from this category always gets a great reaction.

Another reason people love guard jokes is their simplicity. You do not need a long setup or a complicated punchline. A short, clever joke is often all it takes to turn an ordinary moment into a memorable one. That is why these jokes remain a favorite for so many people.

💬 People Also Ask

What is a good Guard Jokes to share?
A good guard jokes depends on your audience and the moment. Browse our collection above and pick one that fits your style and situation.
Are Guard Jokes safe for all ages?
Most guard jokes in our collection are suitable for general audiences. We clearly label any content meant for adults, so you can browse with confidence.
When is the best time to tell Guard Jokes?
guard jokes work well in almost any social setting. Use them to break the ice at a party, lighten the mood at work, or add fun to a casual conversation.
How do I copy and share Guard Jokes?
Every joke on this page has a Copy button. Click it once and the full joke is copied to your clipboard. You can then paste it into messages, emails, or social media posts instantly.
Are new Guard Jokes added regularly?
Yes, we refresh our collection with new guard jokes on a regular basis. Bookmark this page and come back often to discover fresh laughs.
Can I find Guard Jokes for a specific occasion?
Absolutely. Our collection covers many themes and occasions. Browse the related topics section on this page to find jokes tailored to birthdays, holidays, work events, and more.

Tips for Sharing Guard Jokes

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