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Kidnapper Jokes

35 jokes · Page 1 of 2

Jokes / Kidnapper Jokes

What Are Kidnapper Jokes?

Kidnapper Jokes are a fun way to bring laughter to any moment. Whether you need something to share with friends, break the ice at a gathering, or simply enjoy a good laugh, our collection of kidnapper jokes is here for you. Browse through the jokes below and find the ones that make you smile.

Every joke on this page is free to read and easy to share. Click the copy button on any joke to copy it instantly to your clipboard. Paste it into a message, post, or conversation and spread the laughter.

#1
NEWS ITEM.
Kidnappers grabbed a little boy and two days later sent him home with a ransom note. His parents immediately sent the kid back with the money.
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#2
Day 1 of being kidnapped.
Kidnappers are now offering my husband a ransom to take me back. Husband is asking for more money.
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#3
[dark alley] Here's the $3 million, thanks again for this, be sure to send pictures.
Kidnapper: Wait, don't you want your kids back?
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#4
Hey little kid in your adorable pink jacket: I'm no
kidnapper, but if I was, you would be the one.
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#5
What's a kidnapper's favorite kind of shoes?
White Vans
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#6
What kind of tape do kidnappers use?
abDUCT tape
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#7
What do skaters, kidnappers, and hipsters all have in common?
They all have white vans
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#8
*BUSTS DOWN DOOR* *Fires off jokes* *Kidnappers helpless in laughter*
"..and that's how your granpappy saved baby Jesus." - Me, someday
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#9
Kidnappers: We have your husband.
Send us $10,000 if you ever want to see him again. Me: Where I should drop off his clothes?
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#10
Your ex asking if you can still be friends is like kidnappers
saying "keep in touch" after they let you go.
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#11
Where did this concept of kidnappers using white vans come from?
I mean, I just use my Prius, stop being so stereotypical, jeez.
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#12
KIDNAPPER: Get in the van ME: Oh no thanks I'm vegetarian KIDNAPPER: Oh
okay sorry *drives away* {15min later} KIDNAPPER: Wait a minute, wtf
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#13
Your Ex asking to be friends after breaking up is like......Kidnappers
asking to "keep in touch" after letting you go
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#14
If I were a kidnapper, I'd drive around
telling adults there's naps in the van.
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#15
[kidnapper hands wife phone] "brent" BABY IM COMIN *kidnapper takes back
phone but she can hear me yelling* IS THE HAM IN THE FRIDGE EXPIRED
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#16
[phone call] KIDNAPPER: We're gonna kill your wife if you don't pay ME:
*making wind noises* I CAN'T HEAR YOU I'M GOING THROUGH A TUNNEL
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#17
me: i'm really glad we met, i feel like I can completely be myself around u.
u had me at hello kidnapper: pls stop talking
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#18
T H E K I _ _ _ P P E R Taking a
DNA sample from the kidnapper.
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#19
[i wake up confused] KIDNAPPER: youll never guess where we are!
ME: [observing floor tile pattern] this is a Dennys bathroom KIDNAPPER: shit
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#20
"I got you, babe."
- kidnappers
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❓ Frequently Asked Questions

What are the best Kidnapper Jokes?
Our collection features 35 Kidnapper Jokes. Browse the list above and find the ones that make you laugh the most.
Are Kidnapper Jokes suitable for everyone?
Most Kidnapper Jokes on our site are appropriate for general audiences. We clearly label any content meant for adults, so you can browse safely.
Can I copy and share Kidnapper Jokes?
Yes! Every joke has a Copy button. Click it once and the full joke is copied to your clipboard. You can then paste it anywhere you like.
How many Kidnapper Jokes are available?
We currently have 35 Kidnapper Jokes in our collection. We add new ones regularly, so check back often.
Why do people enjoy Kidnapper Jokes?
Kidnapper Jokes are loved because they are easy to remember, fun to share, and work well in almost any social setting.

Why People Enjoy Kidnapper Jokes

Everyone enjoys a good laugh, and kidnapper jokes deliver exactly that. They are easy to remember, fun to share, and work in almost any setting. Whether you are at a party, at work, or chatting online, a well-timed joke from this category always gets a great reaction.

Another reason people love kidnapper jokes is their simplicity. You do not need a long setup or a complicated punchline. A short, clever joke is often all it takes to turn an ordinary moment into a memorable one. That is why these jokes remain a favorite for so many people.

💬 People Also Ask

What is a good Kidnapper Jokes to share?
A good kidnapper jokes depends on your audience and the moment. Browse our collection above and pick one that fits your style and situation.
Are Kidnapper Jokes safe for all ages?
Most kidnapper jokes in our collection are suitable for general audiences. We clearly label any content meant for adults, so you can browse with confidence.
When is the best time to tell Kidnapper Jokes?
kidnapper jokes work well in almost any social setting. Use them to break the ice at a party, lighten the mood at work, or add fun to a casual conversation.
How do I copy and share Kidnapper Jokes?
Every joke on this page has a Copy button. Click it once and the full joke is copied to your clipboard. You can then paste it into messages, emails, or social media posts instantly.
Are new Kidnapper Jokes added regularly?
Yes, we refresh our collection with new kidnapper jokes on a regular basis. Bookmark this page and come back often to discover fresh laughs.
Can I find Kidnapper Jokes for a specific occasion?
Absolutely. Our collection covers many themes and occasions. Browse the related topics section on this page to find jokes tailored to birthdays, holidays, work events, and more.

Tips for Sharing Kidnapper Jokes

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