What Are Said Jokes?
Said Jokes are a fun way to bring laughter to any moment. Whether you need something to share with friends, break the ice at a gathering, or simply enjoy a good laugh, our collection of said jokes is here for you. Browse through the jokes below and find the ones that make you smile.
Every joke on this page is free to read and easy to share. Click the copy button on any joke to copy it instantly to your clipboard. Paste it into a message, post, or conversation and spread the laughter.
#1
I met a girl last night at a bar...
She said she wanted the night to be magical... So i fucked her and disappeared.
#2
Oh yeah bro?
That's not what your mom said last night. I don't think so, anyway. It was a long conversation. She sounds well. Lovely person.
#3
Whoever said, "there's no place like home for the
holidays" clearly hasn't been to my house.
#4
A violist and a cellist were standing on a sinking ship together.
"Help!" cried the cellist "I can't swim!" "Don't worry" said the violist "just fake it."
#5
A fat woman just served me at McDonalds...
... and said "Sorry about the wait". I replied and said "Don't worry, you'll lose it eventually".
#6
So Lisa said she wanted to be friends with benefits Where's my dental plan, you slut?
(source, college humor)
#7
I walked in on the janitor using the women's washroom.
I asked him what he was doing in there. He said "The men's washroom is filthy."
#8
When I was a kid, I knocked out the power in my house.
Mom said it was just a phase.
#9
Why did the dad say the joke instead of act it out?
Because it was cheesier said than done.
#10
[On date] Her - "so your profile said you like classical music?
I love Mozart & Bach, how about you?" Me - "Jurassic Park theme"
#11
Teacher: What is the formula for water?
Student: H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O. Teacher: That's not what I taught you. Student: But you said the formula for water was...H to O.
#12
Two snowmen were talking on a cold day...
One of them said to the other: "funny, I smell carrots too!"
#13
I went to my new male Gynecologist and he said to spread my legs so that he could numb it down there.
So he went down and went numnumnumnumnumnum
#14
My girlfriend called me a pedophile yesterday...
...so I said, "That's a big word for a seven-year-old"
#15
Recent studies link bacon to cancer.
"Ya, don't eat bacon, you'll get so much cancer", said one pink scientist.
#16
My girlfriend said if I don't stop my obsession with Viking culture she'll fight me to
the death "Jokes on you" I said "if I die in battle I'll go straight to Valhalla"
#17
[Jews being led out of Egypt] Woman: *mumbles* 40 years?
He couldn't just stop & ask directions? Moses: WHO SAID THAT? NO MANNA FOR YOU!
#18
I bought condoms.
Cashier asked if I needed a bag, I said no she's not that ugly RT @HeroinHadley:Tweet something inspirational. I need it.
#19
My boyfriend said we could only get one cat.
So I'm only getting one cat. One pregnant cat.
#20
My friend asked me...
My friend asked me if there was a colored printer in the library I said wtf man it's 2016 you can use whatever printer you want
Why People Enjoy Said Jokes
Everyone enjoys a good laugh, and said jokes deliver exactly that. They are easy to remember, fun to share, and work in almost any setting. Whether you are at a party, at work, or chatting online, a well-timed joke from this category always gets a great reaction.
Another reason people love said jokes is their simplicity. You do not need a long setup or a complicated punchline. A short, clever joke is often all it takes to turn an ordinary moment into a memorable one. That is why these jokes remain a favorite for so many people.
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