What Are Leave Jokes?
Leave Jokes are a fun way to bring laughter to any moment. Whether you need something to share with friends, break the ice at a gathering, or simply enjoy a good laugh, our collection of leave jokes is here for you. Browse through the jokes below and find the ones that make you smile.
Every joke on this page is free to read and easy to share. Click the copy button on any joke to copy it instantly to your clipboard. Paste it into a message, post, or conversation and spread the laughter.
#1
ME: [sitting in kitchen writing out bills] SON: I lost a tooth.
I'm gonna leave it under my pillow tonight. ME: I'd wait until next week.
#2
"Your mission...
Should you chose to accept it..." *Go to a bar you Hate *Put $50 in the Jukebox *Play nothing but Nickelback *Leave
#3
Two gay guys are going on vacation...
...the night before they are to leave, one gay guy says to the other, "Hey man, can I pack your shit?"
#4
What did the hippy who has been crashing on your couch for the last 2 weeks say when you asked him to leave?!
Am I supposed to say the answer or let y'all guess for a bit?!
#5
Yttrium-barium-copper oxide walks into a bar The bartender tells him,
"We don't serve superconductors here." He leaves without resistance.
#6
What do you do when your suicidal friend asks for a hi-five?
You leave him hanging....
#7
A magician says to his wife to 'Pick a card.
Any card.' She takes his credit card and leaves.
#8
My hand is stuck in a jar of salsa right now.
I'm just gonna leave it in there. This is who I am now. I'm tired of fighting.
#9
Never raise your hand to your children -
it leaves your midsection unprotected.
#10
Guinness book of world records I use to have my dick in the Guinness book
of world records, but then the librarian told me I had to leave.
#11
I forgot FB was not Twitter & posted something ultra dirty.
Now I have to avoid my granndma, change my hair color & leave the state.
#12
It's time to make like a baby...
And head out. *leaves
#13
My answering machine message: "I have caller ID, please don't leave a
message, I will not be returning your call." No beep, just a foghorn.
#14
Women are like tornadoes...
They moan like hell when they come, and take the house when they leave.
#15
Why is India surprised by the Brexit vote?
They didn't know you could get Britain to leave by voting.
#16
Here's what I know about girls.
If she's angry, it will pass. If she goes silent, leave the country, change your name & start a new life.
#17
WORST THING YOU CAN DO What's the worst thing you can do to a blind person?
Leave the plunger in the toilet!
#18
What did the facial hair say when it had to leave the party?
"Sorry guys, moustache!"
#19
To spice things up in the bedroom, I have my wife dress up as a pizza boy.
Then, I have her put the pizza on the counter and then leave.
#20
Probably already been done but...
What is wrong with a humorless person? A broken funny bone. I'll leave now.
Why People Enjoy Leave Jokes
Everyone enjoys a good laugh, and leave jokes deliver exactly that. They are easy to remember, fun to share, and work in almost any setting. Whether you are at a party, at work, or chatting online, a well-timed joke from this category always gets a great reaction.
Another reason people love leave jokes is their simplicity. You do not need a long setup or a complicated punchline. A short, clever joke is often all it takes to turn an ordinary moment into a memorable one. That is why these jokes remain a favorite for so many people.
Discover More Leave Jokes
Looking for more laughs? Explore the related topics above or try our random joke generator. With hundreds of categories to choose from, you will never run out of fresh material to share and enjoy.
🎲 Get a Random Joke