What Are Positive Jokes?
Positive Jokes are a fun way to bring laughter to any moment. Whether you need something to share with friends, break the ice at a gathering, or simply enjoy a good laugh, our collection of positive jokes is here for you. Browse through the jokes below and find the ones that make you smile.
Every joke on this page is free to read and easy to share. Click the copy button on any joke to copy it instantly to your clipboard. Paste it into a message, post, or conversation and spread the laughter.
#1
In my experience, cross-eyed employees are the best deterrent against shoplifting.
You just can't be positive that they're not watching.
#2
Three positives Thursday afternoon in the office: Me: yay it's 1.45pm, Coworker: and it's
Thursday, Me: three positives, Coworker: what's the third, Me: It's still cumming!
#3
Two Na atoms are together on the battlefield...
One of them gets shot. "I've been hit!" he yells. The other one looks at him. "Are you sure?" He replies, "I'm positive!"
#4
As a gay dude, having a boyfriend with a small penis gets me down sometimes.
But I try to stay positive - I'm an ass half full kind of guy.
#5
Even after repeated search attempts, the atom couldn't find its lost electron...
Yet, on the brighter side, it remained positive.
#6
Sometimes you need to look for the small positives in life.
Like a midget with HIV.
#7
Two atoms in a pub Two atoms meet in the pub.
One says, 'I think I've lost an electron.' The second atom with a strong British accent asks, 'Are you sure?' The first one replies, ' yes I'm positive.'
#8
What's the only positive from living in the ghetto?
Pregnancy tests
#9
The trick to being happy is to keep a positive outlook: For example, my ongoing effort
to break the world record for most ramen eaten while single is going great!
#10
Overheard in the nucleus...
Q: Are you sure you're a proton? A: Yes, I'm positive.
#11
I like how politicians always address us like we are positive, civic-minded, motivated people.
I think we're all a bunch of fat jerks.
#12
My bloodtype is really disappointing.
My doctor keeps saying "be positive".
#13
Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar One says, "I've lost an electron." The
other says, "Are you sure?" The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive."
#14
The most positive subreddit award goes to...
/r/hiv
#15
What does a battery have that a women hasn't?
A positive side....
#16
I visited Amsterdam this summer, and decided to have sex with a prostitute.
It was an overall positive experience. Sadly, it was an HIV positive experience.
#17
An African athlete has been banned from the Commonwealth Games after
testing positive to a performance enhancing substance.' ....Food.
#18
Nigel Farage gets his girlfriend pregnant..
Soon after the pregnancy test arrived as positive, he says "My fatherhood ambition has been achieved. I want my life back"
#19
On a positive note, once Trump becomes president and burns the world
to the ground, our student loan debt is essentially wiped clean
#20
One positive of Arnold Palmer's passing...
He's six under for the first time in years...
Why People Enjoy Positive Jokes
Everyone enjoys a good laugh, and positive jokes deliver exactly that. They are easy to remember, fun to share, and work in almost any setting. Whether you are at a party, at work, or chatting online, a well-timed joke from this category always gets a great reaction.
Another reason people love positive jokes is their simplicity. You do not need a long setup or a complicated punchline. A short, clever joke is often all it takes to turn an ordinary moment into a memorable one. That is why these jokes remain a favorite for so many people.
Discover More Positive Jokes
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