What Are Ready Jokes?
Ready Jokes are a fun way to bring laughter to any moment. Whether you need something to share with friends, break the ice at a gathering, or simply enjoy a good laugh, our collection of ready jokes is here for you. Browse through the jokes below and find the ones that make you smile.
Every joke on this page is free to read and easy to share. Click the copy button on any joke to copy it instantly to your clipboard. Paste it into a message, post, or conversation and spread the laughter.
#1
"Alright, now who's ready to fuck and get some fiber?!"
- Keynote Speaker at the 'Fuck 'N Fiber' Convention
#2
I saw a slim white guy in a dark alley that was so shady but funny...
..so funny and shady in fact, that if you saw him in a room full of ready to laugh people sitting down, he'd stand up.
#3
Fat, single and ready
for a pringle!
#4
Date: Are you ready to take on another man's child?
Me: yes Later- Date: This is.. *I knock her kid out with one punch Me: too easy!
#5
Today, I walked into a restaurant.
"Hi, is my table ready?" "No, not yet sir. Do you mind waiting?" "No, that's okay." "Great, take these salads to table six then."
#6
Monday, after class, I get back to my dorm ready
to start all my homework due this week.
#7
"Son, I want to let you know that you were adopted.
"What?! Really?!", I said. "Yep! Go pack your things and get ready", my dad said. "They'll be here to pick you up in twenty minutes."
#8
I think I'm about to be molested by an alpaca...
Today some guy on the street kept screaming at me to "be ready for the alpaca lips"
#9
The difference between a Life Scout and an Eagle Scout.
A Life Scout is ready for anything. The Eagle Scout is ready for Murphy's Law.
#10
So...
a German is getting ready to enter in a plane to Poland. "Occupation?" - The officer asks. "Occupation? No! I'm here to visit!"
#11
*holds pen ready* "How many zeros in one million?"
"Six" "Ok, thanks" *writes milli000000n*
#12
What did the Italian bigfoot say when someone yelled, "Hey
Abominable Snowman, are you ready to go?" "Not-a-Yeti"
#13
I'm ready to start a family, in the sense that
I have enough chip clips for 6 people.
#14
I like my women how i like my Little Ceasars Pizza...
Hot and Ready for only $5.
#15
What do canes and blue pills have in common?
They're both ready for use when a man is limp.
#16
A taliban and his wife are getting ready to go to sleep at night...
...but before that, the taliban goes out to pee. He returns back all wet. "Is it raining outside?" "No, it's windy..."
#17
Get ready for a corny joke!
***What is Mr. Corn's philosophy on life?*** Life is a maze.
#18
The National Shredded Cheese Council just endorsed Donald Trump for president...
They're ready to make America grate again.
#19
"My god, it's the zombie apocalypse.
Everyone grab the most critical items and get ready to run" *me holding a Shrek 2 DVD* Way ahead of you
#20
I want to die like my grandfather .
..peaceful . . . ready to go. Not kicking and screaming like the passengers in his car
Why People Enjoy Ready Jokes
Everyone enjoys a good laugh, and ready jokes deliver exactly that. They are easy to remember, fun to share, and work in almost any setting. Whether you are at a party, at work, or chatting online, a well-timed joke from this category always gets a great reaction.
Another reason people love ready jokes is their simplicity. You do not need a long setup or a complicated punchline. A short, clever joke is often all it takes to turn an ordinary moment into a memorable one. That is why these jokes remain a favorite for so many people.
Discover More Ready Jokes
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