What Are Him Jokes?
Him Jokes are a fun way to bring laughter to any moment. Whether you need something to share with friends, break the ice at a gathering, or simply enjoy a good laugh, our collection of him jokes is here for you. Browse through the jokes below and find the ones that make you smile.
Every joke on this page is free to read and easy to share. Click the copy button on any joke to copy it instantly to your clipboard. Paste it into a message, post, or conversation and spread the laughter.
#1
How do you kill a one legged Fox?
Make him run across Canada
#2
Why didn't the cannibal eat Mike Tyson?
He thought he would give him a paunch!
#3
If I was Penguin's attorney I'd request bail by saying "He's no flight risk!" Then Hi-5 the whole courtroom but Batman.
I'd leave him hangin
#4
Recently, a Catholic hair stylist made news traveling around slandering the pope and Catholicism, angering many members of the faith.
The pope denounced him... calling him a "hair-a-tick"
#5
An 8 yr old boy was screaming at the grocery store because his mom wouldn't buy him a Mars bar.
So I bought one and ate it in front of him.
#6
Charlie Brown decided to wear transparent pants one day...
...and when Lucy saw him she said "I always thought you were a blockhead, Charlie Brown, but now I can plainly see your nuts."
#7
Me: I'm ghosting him.
Her: You stopped talking to him? Me: No, I'm showing up when he least expects it and scaring the shit out of him.
#8
Him- I saw you over here sipping your wine.
Me- You clearly have me mistaken for another very attractive woman, because I don't sip wine.
#9
Elliott Smith...
Wouldn't know heartache if it stabbed him in the chest.
#10
So a pirate walks into a bar...
A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel on his pants. The bartender asks him why he has the wheel on him, and the pirate replies "YARR! IT'S DRIVIN' ME NUTS!"
#11
A homosexual, a pedophile, and a priest walk into a bar.
The bartender asks him what he would like to drink.
#12
If I ever get a dog I'm going to teach him how to fetch useful
things like tv remotes, iPhones and men who like red wine.
#13
Me: My weight is up.
I really hate winter. Him: Don't be discouraged. You'll bounce back in spring once you shave your legs.
#14
How did Jesus feel when they crucified him?
He was cross.
#15
Doctor's Office Visit The doctor asked me how my bowel movements have been lately, I told him very dark.
He asked me to describe so I said, "every time i look into the bowl, it spells out 'DIE'"
#16
How did Darth Vadar know what Luke got him for Christmas?
He felt his presence
#17
I adopted a highway.
Don't tell anyone I said this, but I don't love him as much as I love my biological highways.
#18
*exorcism* DEMON: *roars* PRIEST: we must restrain him!
WIFE: *opens drawer* here! *tosses fuzzy pink handcuffs* PRIEST: ... DEMON: hey now
#19
Why do we PARK on a DRIVEway, but my mom's boyfriend
Craig won't let me call him Dad when we hug?
#20
Him: you're so beautiful.
The moment you smiled at me,u had me Me: that's really sweet Me in my head: I have a piece of my poo in my purse
Why People Enjoy Him Jokes
Everyone enjoys a good laugh, and him jokes deliver exactly that. They are easy to remember, fun to share, and work in almost any setting. Whether you are at a party, at work, or chatting online, a well-timed joke from this category always gets a great reaction.
Another reason people love him jokes is their simplicity. You do not need a long setup or a complicated punchline. A short, clever joke is often all it takes to turn an ordinary moment into a memorable one. That is why these jokes remain a favorite for so many people.
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